The Game-Changing Insight Every Woman in Leadership Needs

For women in leadership, empowerment often means seeing yourself as capable, resilient, and worthy. But one of the biggest game-changers I’ve discovered, and that I share with my clients, is understanding what really creates our experience.

This realisation – that our experience is 100% an internally thought-generated response – changes everything. Imagine putting on virtual reality goggles and suddenly realising the world you “see” isn’t an absolute reality; it’s simply your interpretation of it, shaped by everything you’ve been through up to this moment.

Think of it this way.  Each of us is wearing our own unique VR headset. Through this headset, we see a world created from our beliefs, emotions, and life experiences. What we see is entirely personal. It’s our reality, but it isn’t “the reality.” When I help women in leadership truly understand this, it’s like they get to take control of their own VR headset, adjust their lens, and finally see clearly beyond the old limitations they used to feel held back by.

And here’s where it gets interesting. So many of us were conditioned to believe that what happens outside of us is what creates our experience. We’re taught that stressful work situations, difficult conversations, or other people’s opinions are what make us feel the way we do. But that’s not actually what’s going on. Our experience isn’t created by outside events but by our own thoughts and beliefs about those events. And the real magic? Because our experience is thought-generated, it’s completely fluid and transitionary. It can shift moment to moment, depending on where we put our focus and energy.

For women in leadership, the impact of this insight is profound. We’re often dealing with the weight of expectations, not just from the workplace but also from deep-rooted stories we’ve picked up along the way. Many of us carry habitual reactions from childhood or years of “proving ourselves,” stories that make us react a certain way in challenging situations or influence how we see ourselves in a boardroom. But once we realise that our reactions aren’t based on fixed truths – they’re just responses from our internal “programming” – we have a choice. We don’t have to keep giving our power away to old stories.

One of the most empowering shifts I see is when women in leadership understand that they’re not bound by these past identities. We don’t have to keep reacting based on old stories that may no longer serve us. Our reality is ours to shape, deliberately and consciously, right here and now.

Imagine how freeing that is. Instead of running on autopilot, we can decide how we want to experience the world. We can look at a challenge and see opportunity, face self-doubt and choose resilience, and approach new situations with curiosity instead of fear. Recognising that our experience is internally generated allows us to step out of being passive observers and into becoming creators of our reality.

This insight isn’t about ignoring life’s challenges or pretending everything’s perfect. It’s about gaining a new level of self-awareness, knowing that we can shape our response to anything life throws our way. Instead of feeling stuck in the same old stories or limited by the beliefs we’ve carried for years, we can let go of what doesn’t serve us and choose to see things in a new way.

For me, this shift came with the realisation that changing my experience was far simpler than I’d thought. I didn’t need to tackle every external problem – I needed to shift my perspective. When I understood that my experience was created from within, it gave me a sense of freedom I hadn’t felt before, and that’s what I’m passionate about sharing with women in leadership.

When you truly see that you’re the creator of your experience, it’s like the world opens up, and you’re finally free to step into your power. You’re no longer defined by old programmes or limited by stories from the past. Instead, you’re leading from a place of clarity, intention, and confidence.

And that’s when real magic happens – when you’re leading not just from a position of authority but from a place of empowered authenticity. That’s where everything changes.